10,000 oceans...

I'm a crier. 

It's what I do. I cry when I'm sad, I cry when I'm happy. I cry when I'm frustrated or tired or not feeling well. I cry when I'm hurt or when something touches my heart. I cry when I'm overwhelmed and when I'm overthinking. I feel like I've cried 10,000 oceans in my lifetime and that I'm nowhere near close to being finished. 

I've been made to feel like crying is a bad thing. A manipulative thing. Something a weak person does and something that I shouldn't do. 

And that's not true. Or fair. 

Crying can be a healthy release. Something that people like me [who have a difficult time saying what we want and need] need as a way to get all of those overflowing emotions out. 

That being said, I've decided that I need a safe place to let those emotions out on the regular so they don't get so bottled up and overwhelming. So I've started going to a therapist. And I actually feel a little guilt and embarrassment typing those words out. We've made seeking therapy such a taboo subject and one that is still so looked down upon that it's detrimental for people's health. We're afraid to admit that we need some help and instead hold everything in or let it explode out and never really learn how to deal with the raging tidal wave of emotions that flows through us each and every day. So I'm breaking that taboo and putting it out there. And trying to not feel ashamed or guilty about it. 

Baby steps. 

love & cupcakes, 


Jamie said...

I'm proud of you for posting this, and more importantly doing the things you need to do to be your best self. Also, for helping to nullify the stigma that is often tied to therapy!


Elissa Newman Huggett said...

Aww, thanks! Even after just one session I already feel so much better. Talking really helps! Thanks for all of your advice and support. =]